We are sitting on the plane in Shanghai waiting to take off. Air Canada – what can I say? I will be delighted to share my thoughts about this later, but this is about some experiences over the last couple of days in Bali and Shanghai.

On Sunday (three days ago, we were in a bit of a quiet mood – we lazed around the villa and didn’t leave there until 1:30 when we went for lunch. First, the “sidewalks” in Semanyak. It is dangerous to walk along these. They are 18” x 36” concrete slabs which have been laid over the open ditches below. These ditches have running water and discarded garbage – cups, wrappers, cigarette butts etc. floating in them. The problem is that there are frequent gaps between the slabs or broken pieces  missing. If you are not constantly looking down you may very likely step in one of these holes and break a leg or foot. You can’t walk very easily on the road either since there is so much traffic there. The other evening it took our taxi almost 30 minutes to go 2 ½ blocks.

Anyway, lunch. We were sitting in an outdoor café right on the street. Very cool, if noisy place to watch the people. I think there are more white people in Semanyak than there is in all of China. And, apparently, it is a good market for Viagra and Cialis since as we sat there I was offered both. The fellow next to me said not to take it personally, though – he too was offered it and he was about 24 and on his honeymoon. From there it was off to foot massage and pedicure for Terry and full slimming massage with oil and pedicure for Geoff! It was another interesting experience. The room is about 12’ x 12’, it has three massage beds, three foot massage chairs and a cabinet. I explain this so that you understand that it is a very tight space.

There were two women there – 24 and 36. The younger one worked on Terry and the older one on me. First, it is a little unsettling (at least it was unsettling for me) when a perfect stranger says to strip down to your underwear (what will the two of them think of my body?), knowing she is about to rub oil and cream all over me – and I mean all over me. She was only about 4’6” so when she was working on my back she had to – no other word for it – mount me. She worked the inside of my thighs right to the top, even going under the bit of cloth I was wearing, trying to retain some dignity.  I won’t bore you with the rest of the details, but I will say that I was glad Terry was sitting at the end of the bed to protect me! Now to the pedicure. People who know me will not believe that I had one of these since I am insanely ticklish. The two girls were in gales of laughter as she worked on them, sanding, scrubbing, filing and washing. She was very lucky to come out alive!

Sunday evening we went to Djimbaran for dinner. There are 200 or so seafood restaurants right along the beach. You go in, choose your fish, seafood whatever then go out and sit at a table on the beach. They bring you rice to go with it. We had fabulous Red Snapper, acceptable, but small, mussels and very disappointing squid – but a nice bottle of white wine helped it all go down. Cost – $42 for the food, $45 for the wine. The owner asked me as we were leaving how it was and I said the snapper was excellent – he looked and asked again – same reply – foolishly he asked for a third time so I told him and he quickly disappeared into the back. If you don’t want to know, why ask?

Monday we had arranged to have Donny the driver take us to Kintamani which is an extinct volcano in the north. We have a wonderful Balinese tapas lunch overlooking the valley and watched the trucks loaded with volcanic rocks struggle up the hill.

As we drove back we encountered the first blatant act of corruption. Four police officers were stopping the cars and collecting money – for no reason other than, according to Donny, they needed cigarette money. We gave then 10000rph ($1.00) and away we went. A little surreal.

When we arranged to have Donny drive us, Charles told us that the day would be 350,000rph ($35) and that we should just pay him. Now Charles and Laurence have gone on at some length to tell us how greedy and lazy the Balinese are. We asked Donny if we should pay him or Charles and he said him. Terry asked how much and he said “Did Charles tell you?” and we said 350,000rph. He said right. Later Terry heard him telling Charles that we had paid him 300,000. Now either Charles thinks we ripped Donny off, or Charles was planning on ripping him off himself – we’re all for the latter.

Well, we are winding down our Bali experience. It has been interesting, to say the least.

We took a guided tour “inside Bali” to see how the real (read poor) Balinese live.  It was fascinating to see the local villages, family temples, ways of work.  Bali is beautiful inland—much nicer than the crowded, noisy tourist areas, filled with hotels, small shops, bars and restaurants.  We learned about local culture, the pervasiveness of religion—specifically Hindu religion—and Bali traditions.

Our guide was named Putu, which is the name given to all first born children, male or female, in Bali.  There are 5 names in total and a family simply uses the next name on the list.  If 6 children, 2 Putus; possibly 200, 000 Putus on the island.  It could drive teachers mad.   There must be some way of distinguishing them, like Putu from the bridge or Big Putu and Small Putu, but we don’t know for sure.  When we got home,  Charles asked us who our guide was and when we told him, he nodded knowingly.  Really?

Putu told us that when you are not happy with someone or something, you draw out the syllable, so when his dad was upset with him, he would say, “Putuuuuuuuu.”  We said, “Ubuuuuud.”  Putu also told us about him and his brothers as kids.  Dads are the disciplinarians and it got so the the boys could hear their dad’s motorbike a half hour out, hence the title of this blog.  When they heard it, they all scurried to take care of the chores they should have done during the day.

Rice terraces were one of the destinations on our journey.  These ones were simply along the way.

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Ah, now here are rice terraces.  These are protected by Unesco and are a world heritage site.  No permanent structures may be added and the farmers must continue to use traditional methods of farming.  That means no machinery larger than a hand operated roto-tiller.

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Terraces – Rice

Lazy Balinese

I want to say first that our hosts, Laurence and Charles are very gracious people. They can’t do enough for you, but they do hold some rather right wing views. For example he told us on day 1 that he liked Reagan, but after that the country went to hell, staring with Clinton (BTW – Happy 50th Birthday this week to Monica). Anyway last night we had a drink with them and they were telling us how lazy the Balinese people are. They move slowly and only do enough to get by. They have no get up and go. They sell off their rice terraces to Westerners who then build villas and sell them to other Westerners. “Why can’t they take the money and build the villas themselves?” they asked. We stopped at a stone quarry on our tour yesterday (#2) and Laurence’s contention is that this person is only doing this for the tourists. She also maintained that they are lazy because once they plant the rice, they just wait for it to grow and don’t do anything until harvest time. (What? – isn’t that what all farmers do?  Well, yes, that and tend to the machinery for harvest, mend barriers, rebuild roofs on the barn and out buildings, look after the animals, study the price of grain and pray a lot that their crop won’t be wiped out by disease, hail or drought, or, in the case of Balinese, destroyed by the rat population.  Periodically, as they wait for the rice to grow, they must attend organized rat kills and hunt the rodents, then kill them by hand.  They atone for the death of the rats by holding a brief religious ceremony.) There were more examples, but I’m sure you get the picture. And, speaking of picture, here are 7 photos of traditional Balinese people – being lazy.

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House

#1  We stopped here for coffee on our way to the rice terraces.   The hosts were supremely gracious, showing us first the “Happy Room” and then serving us hot coffee and tea and a selection of home-made baking.

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Farming

Comic Relief

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Hot Spring

Mangy Dog

Lunch in the jungle

Well, we have been in Bali for four nights – almost as long as the time in immigration! We have shopped, drank, eaten, drank, toured, drank, swum, drank and drank. Greg and Chan, friends from Shanghai, have joined us for the first few days, and it has been under their careful guidance that we have explored Bali.

Villa Sukapadi

To begin, a short explanation of Villa Sukapadi. Each morning our pembantu arrives to cook breakfast for us. It is either Made (pronounced Maday), Sera (Sara) or Aris. They are all very delightful women. After breakfast they clean the place, do our laundry and let us relax. The villa is owned by Charles and Laurence. He is from San Francisco and she is from Paris. They met here about twenty years ago, fell in love, got married and stayed. We spent a pleasant evening with them last night over wine and nibblies. Below are some photos of our villa. Their home, which is adjacent to the villa, is more spectacular.

Now, about Bali. Interesting place. We went to a traditional Balinese restaurant the other night. They had good food and lots of traditional dance entertainment. These kids were right around 6 years of age. They were very good – especially since the dance went on for almost 10 minutes and they knew the entire thing. Very impressive.

Bali is also full of scooters and motor bikes and some cars. Our driver yesterday told me that there are 4 million motorcycles on the island – and I believe it. We came back from Ubud (pronounced Oooboood) around 4:30 and there were packs of 20 or 30 of them every 30 seconds or so. It was amazing. They are in and out of the traffic constantly. I was waiting for some kind of accident or eruption of road rage but nothing.

How’s the traffic? Well the driver told us we were about 10 kms from the villa and it would take us about an hour! He lied – traffic wasn’t too bad – only took 45 minutes. When we went to Ubud, it took 2 1/2 hours – 30 kms.

On our way home the other night three of these trucks went by – the first two had even more workers in them – they were packed in there like sardines.

Bali is 70% Hindu and these little things are all over the place. The are offerings to the gods to bring people good luck and are replaced everyday. You find them on the street, on sidewalks, in doorways of shops and anywhere else people might like – car dashboards, for example.

Near Ubud is an interesting coffee plantation. We had been asking our driver to stop so we could get some coffee – but he was on a mission to get us to this place. Years ago, the Dutch took all the good coffee back to Holland so the locals were left with the scraps. The civet eats the coffee berries and then poops them out. The locals then clean them all off and process them. The beans themselves are triple coated so the beans themselves are never in touch with anything undesirable. We had a cup each – $5.00 plus a “complimentary” variety of 9 teas and coffees – ginger, vanilla, mangosteen, lemon grass to name a few. The coffee was a little gritty – and quite honestly we didn’t think it was worth what they were charging.

In Ubud is the Monkey Forest, where you can pay to go in and see the monkeys or not pay and stand on the street and see the monkeys on the street, on the electrical/phone wires, roofs etc.

Eat, Love, Pray – the Elizabeth Gilbert book /Julia Roberts movie was filmed near Ubud. Apparently after the movie came out, Ubud was besieged with Julia Roberts wannabes.

(Ed. note: Bali-Hai is the local beer.)

What a trip!

Since our flight left (supposedly) at 8:05 am Monday morning, Sunday evening we stayed at the Ramada Pudong Airport so that we wouldn’t have to get up at some ungodly hour to be at the airport by 6:00. We, along with about 8 others (including an elderly couple, a young couple with a very young son and a few more) caught the 6 am shuttle to the terminal, arriving at 6:05.

Pudong Airport Anecdote #1

We arrive at the terminal, and Terry gets out of the van first. The driver opens the back doors of the van, takes the yung couple’s stroller out, not so gently tosses it to the ground and steps back. Terry thinks that he thought she was alone so he asked her which her suitcase was. Since we were the first on the shuttle, hers is quite buried, so he steps aside, never to move again until he closed the rear doors. Yes, the removal of all of the luggage was left to us.  Now getting the bags down was no easy feat – I think the young couple had 16 tons (Tennessee Ernie Ford) in three suitcases themselves. it was quite funny to watch the driver, though – we all just looked at one another, mouths open and then laughed – what else could you do.

Pudong Airport Anecdote #2

At check in we asked if they had any seats available on the exit aisle – doesn’t everyone want extra leg room for a flight of 5 1/2 hours? Apparently so, since all the seats were taken. But wait, once we were airborne and after about an hour in the air I got up to take a walk. This is what I saw.

Pudong Airport Anecdote #3

After check-in we decided to get some breakfast. For those who travel to Shanghai and then fly out, be warned. Despite its size and newness (completed 1999), it must be the world’s worst serviced airports. Burger King, Ramen Noodle shop and a bar are about it in terms of food service – really. But want to buy a scarf – well there you are. We went for the ramen noodles. To say that the staff seem disinterested is an understatement. We went in, sat down and said hello about three times to the server who was all of three feet away, each time with no response. She finally walked away. After about 5 minutes someone came by and took our order and asked us to pay. I shall cut this short. We asked four different people for Terry’s iced tea, which supposedly came with her meal. Finally, when I saw a server bring out a tray of them for another table, I just got up, went over and took one, much to everyone’s amazement. Now I know why you pay first – the service was so incredibly bad you might very well have to leave to catch your plane before your order came.

Pudong Airport Anecdote #4

China is big on family uniforms. These three had the same shirts. In the yellow circle it says either “I am the Dad”, “I am the Mom” or “I am the Baby”.

Inflight Anecdote #1

As we are about to land, they came on twice to remind us that all cell phones were to be turned off. The passenger in the seat next to me felt this did not apply to him and kept it on. After we landed, I entered into a brief (but fairly intense) discussion about it with him. His opinion is that it is “rubbish” and I should “run to the teacher”. As we left I stopped and told the head flight attendant about it, giving him his seat number. They appeared to be most appreciative. Terry was not so pleased….

Denpassar Airport Anecdote #1

To give you some perspective on our arrival in Bali, think of the Bellingham airport. That is the size of the “Arrivals” area. Now, think of four or five 747s arriving at the same time. Now think of the fact that despite what it says on the Internet, Canadians, along with 89 other nationalities, have to line up and purchase a visa upon arrival to get into the country. Now think of those times when you go to the bank and all the tellers except two are closed. Now, think of the fact that it took us two and a half  hours to fly from Singapore. Now think of the fact that it took us another two and a half hours of standing in a hot humid line to get the visas and pass through immigration.

Welcome to Bali!

*The original Road to Bali is a 1952 American comedy film directed by Hal Walker and starring Bing Crosby, Bob Hope, and Dorothy Lamour. Released by Paramount Pictures on November 1, 1952, the film is the sixth of the seven Road to … movies. It was the only such movie filmed in color and was the first to feature surprise cameo appearances from other well-known stars of the day.

Well folks, after a couple of beer and several glasses of wine (Greg), a spiked fruit juice, and several glasses of wine (Chan), a beer, a G anT and several glasses of wine (Terry), a beer, a G and T and several glasses of wine (Geoff), a plunge or two in the pool and much discussion, we have come to a decision on the travel anecdotes. These are the 3 Grand Prize winners, although you all know that you are all winners in our hearts and we will be emailing you the second prize photos soon. The Grand Prize winners, in no particular order, are Lynne “My underwear is showing” Cregg-Guinon, Mark “Where’s Tower Bridge?” Franklin, and Val “It’s not me, it’s Erin that needs a drink” Goodridge. We look forward to seeing you soon in Jiaxing!!

Lynne “My underwear is showing” Cregg-Guinon

I was travelling home alone after a trip to Europe and when I was waiting at the baggage carousel in Vancouver to collect my luggage I noticed a suitcase go by which was completely encapsulated in what appeared to be heavy duty saran wrap. I thought to myself, hmmm  now there’s someone who is a bit anal about their luggage getting damaged.  Several minutes went by with no sign of my suitcase arriving.  I did however then notice that there were some pairs of ladies panties, a bra and some socks loose on the carousel and also what looked like a card of some sort.  Perhaps a birthday card or some such thing I again thought.  I thought, oh dear, poor unfortunate person that has to step forward and claim those.

More time elapsed as the assembly of ladies undergarments went unclaimed.  Hmmmm.  I moved closer.  OMG, imagine the horror when the card went by again and I recognised my Mother’s handwriting on the card.  It was a birthday card that she was sending back for one of the kids birthdays.  Oh dear Jesus, did that mean that the other accoutrements were also mine? Yes, indeed they were.  Did the embarrased female step forward and claim her items?   Yes, she did but only when the carousel had stopped, the other passengers had left and one of the baggage handlers lifted the “anal” piece of baggage from the carousel.  It was wrapped because the zip had broken. Enough said.

Mark “Where’s Tower Bridge?” Franklin

The photo shows Mark and our two sons in London, with the Tower Bridge in the background. Mark spent an inordinate amount of time wandering about London with his face in his smartphone. He was determined to make his walking GPS work, and if that meant missing what was going on around him, so be it! The boys and I would forge ahead, enjoying all that London has to experience. Then we would turn around and wait for Mark to catch up as he walked, looking only at his phone. This candid photo captures Mark and his beloved phone, Cody to his right (your left), face in palm, and Sean to his left (your right), semi-comatose with frustration.

Val “It’s not me, it’s Erin that needs a drink” Goodridge

A few years ago, Erin and I took a wonderful mother/daughter trip to Italy. We had been wandering around Capri and on the way back to our hotel, tired, hot and just a little bit grumpy, we discovered a wonderful little shop that sold wine and all sorts of other specialty food items. We went in and spent some time ohhing and awwing at all the goodies. We emerged with snacks and a bottle of Italy’s finest, we thought. Once back at our hotel with mouths watering for a glass of wine and some appetizers, we discovered there was no ice bucket or ice to be found. We even called the front desk only to be told they didn’t have such a thing. However, not to be thwarted in our desire for a glass of wine, this is how we chilled the wine. How’s that for using good Canadian ingenuity?

After an hour or so, we pulled the bottle out, washed it off and popped the cork. Looking forward to this wonderful wine we made a short toast and each took a sip. It was awful! The rest of the bottle went down the drain and we went out for a drink.

 

Congratulations and Thanks to all who entered. It was fun.